Well, the inevitable has happened. After uploading our latest flip camera videos onto the computer, the husband noticed a significant gap in film footage - like six or seven months missing.
Husband - "What do you think happened?"
me - (busy cleaning kitchen) "Um...life?"
Husband - "Does it make you sad that six months of Joey's life have not been documented?" (spoken with an edge of sarcasm)
me - (scrubbing a tad more aggressively) "Yes. It had occurred to me that I had not been filming as many things."
Husband - "Well, OK."
Note to self. Locate flip video camera. Immediately.
It is true. We have failed to capture our son's every move, our second born, the very one who will carry on the Larson name. Long ago, I stopped printing pictures, attempting to maintain current photo albums for each of our children. But when I look to the shelves that hold the evidence of projects started and abandoned, there is the proof - her five albums to his one. One, that is not. even. half. full. Our flip camera library contains video after sweet video of the little lady's life, each giggle, squirm, hiccup, nap, and milestone. The amount of hours Jeff and I spent just starring at our dark-eyed beauty alone might number in the, oh...I don't know...hundreds.
Older and wiser parents caution you that it will happen. They joke that with each consecutive child born, less pictures are snapped, less video recorded. However, deep down you baulk at their warnings, knowing that surely you would never let that happen to your child, no matter what their birth order. But alas, here we are, only two children in and already we have shown first born pictorial favoritism. I'm guessing Joe is not the first child to fall victim to milestone chronicling failures. It makes me wonder how many photo albums the Duggar family has lying (or not lying) around.
When your second child comes along so much of their precious life is wrapped up in the life of their older sibling. You attempt to separate their moments, but unavoidably their moments blend together, creating a harmony and chemistry that is uniquely theirs. You do not intentionally reach for your camera less, your hands are just busier now, holding not one but two tiny hands. Your first priority is not capturing an image, but living in the moment.
My dear little man,
Forgive me for not reaching for the video camera all those many months. In all honesty, I believe it was your beautiful, bright eyes that captivated me, causing me to forget. You have been my constant companion since your birth, where I am, you are. I have studied your face, each curve, each expression. Your sweet song-like voice is one I know well, and will never forget. Please know that while your sister's big personality has been featured in countless family videos, you are in no way a wall flower. Each day you surprise us with your humor, animated expressions, curiosity, playful manner, and dynamic display of emotions. You probably know this by now, but you have a very special and prominent place in my heart. You need me, and I, you. Because of you, Charlotte's life was forever changed. You are her best friend, cheerleader, playmate, and confidant. You balance our family in so many ways. And, lest you think we threw away our video camera upon your arrival, please know there are many precious videos capturing your growth. Just remember it's quality over quantity.
From this day forward, I will make every effort to pull out the camera more, because you are really something, and it would be a shame to miss six more months of your growth. And, just to get things started off on the right foot - proof that I really do take pictures of just you every once in awhile.
I and love and you.
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